Sometimes, things happen that make even the most avowed atheists start to believe in divine intervention. Like the Albanian nun who came to a city and provided refuge to its wretched masses, making the whole world believe in her divinity. Or a coke-snorting footballer who ran through the entire English football team’s defence – after scoring with his hand – to show them who’s the boss right after England beat Argentina in the Falklands War.
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Or a Swiss patent clerk, working away from the world of academia, writing four papers that forever changed how we perceive the universe.
The patent clerk, known to the world as Albert Einstein, once famously told Niels Bohr during the debate about quantum mechanics: “God doesn’t play dice.” But given Donald Trump’s recent trysts with reality, it almost makes you wonder if the smirking big guy does play dice for him.
Here’s the evidence. Both times that he won the presidency, he beat female candidates. The man who beat him last time lost mental cognition halfway through the battle, forcing the Democrats to install a Black-Indian female candidate with six vacillating accents who couldn’t take softball interviews to save her life and struggled whenever she was required to speak rather than laugh. Divine intervention?
And then, just to ensure he would not be beaten, he survived an assassination attempt by shifting his head at the last moment. And as if surviving the assassination attempt wasn’t enough, God’s dice for Trump appear to only hit the number he wants.
The most prominent anti-Trump cartoonist was just arrested for possessing child pornography. Justin Trudeau, once hailed as the new avatar of Saint Barack, resigned in infamy even as Trump mocked him from Mar-a-Lago. The Israel-Hamas ceasefire deal, which was turning into a re-enactment of Waiting for Godot, was rammed home with a couple of days to spare. California, the most blue-pilled state in America, home to the crème de la crème of Hollywood who are all anti-Trump, faced almost biblical wildfires. Maybe there’s a big guy after all, and he likes the orange guy down here.
Here are five events that will make you wonder if the big guy is rolling the dice for Trump.
Dodging the Bullet
Bill Burr once joked in an SNL monologue, right after Trump’s election, that assassins couldn’t get a bead on Trump because of his jerky body movements. However for more serious believers, when Donald trumped death, shifting his head at the last moment, it was the first sign of divine intervention for many of his followers—a glimpse of the promised land. Prominent MAGA theorist Jack Posobiec was quick to cite Ephesians 6:11: “Put on the whole armour of God, that you may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil.” While most Republicans were quick to praise God, some saw this as a sign from the heavens. Matthew D. Taylor, a senior theological scholar, said many saw the event as a modern prophecy fulfilled, especially among a section of evangelical Christians who believe contemporary prophets deliver God’s words. For this group, Trump isn’t just a political figure—he’s a vessel chosen to enact God’s will in a chaotic world.
The Cartoonist’s Sin
Darrin Bell, the first Black man to win a Pulitzer for political cartoons, was an artistic tour de force whose polemic takes on Trump were widely shared in liberal circles. In one cartoon, referencing the infamous Hollywood Access tapes, Trump is shown trying to grope the Statue of Liberty. Another depicts Trump supporters as groomers. Recently, Bell was arrested for possessing over 100 videos of child pornography, including AI-generated ones. He became the first person arrested under California’s new laws cracking down on AI porn. For Trump fans, this was the perfect sign of divine retribution for a man who called all Republicans “white supremacists, neo-Nazis, alt-right MAGA fascists, bigots and extremists.”
Justin’s Farewell
This author wrote earlier in his weekly newsletter: “When Trudeau arrived on the scene, he was the love child of Harry Potter and Luke Skywalker, the Chosen One who was going to bring balance to the Force in the liberal world order. He used terms like ‘gender-balanced cabinet’ and LGBTQIXYZ something, he showed off his Chewbacca socks, and he explained (albeit wrongly) quantum computing.”
Trudeau, hailed as the anti-Trump, was someone who welcomed migrants as Trump shut borders. The WENA media couldn’t get enough of him. Now the shoe is firmly on the other foot as Trudeau resigned from the leadership of the Liberal Party, his ratings plummeting even as Trump mocked him as ‘Governor’ of the Great State of Canada.
Blue-Pilled Wildfire
California governor Gavin Newsom announced the deployment of over 7,500 firefighters and emergency personnel to protect communities across California. (Photo: AP)
Sure, scientists will claim it’s the Santa Ana winds or climate change, but the fact is that the most blue-pilled state in America—home to Hollywood, where the crème de la crème of Trump critics dwell—is facing a gigantic catastrophe of biblical proportions.
The fact that California is Vice President Kamala Harris’s home state, run entirely by Democrats from top to bottom, including Governor Gavin Newsom, adds fuel to the fire. Newsom, once projected as a future presidential candidate, now faces a narrative in tatters as critics point to the state’s mismanagement under his leadership.
The state that swears by DEI is struggling to counter MAGA’s argument that California’s DEI initiatives undermining meritocracy are responsible for the wildfires. Statements like “you need a firefighter who looks like you” have come back to bite the Democrats.
The Peacemaker
Richard Nixon coined the famous notion of madman diplomacy, which Captain Jack Sparrow explained to Will Turner as: “You can always trust the dishonest man to be dishonest. Honestly, it’s the honest ones you want to watch out for because you can never predict when they’re going to do something incredibly… stupid.”
That is equally true of Trump, who kept peace in his first term by angry tweeting. Before the elections, and to the incredulity of liberals, Trump managed to garner votes from both American Jews and Arab-Americans.
This sentiment carried particular weight in Michigan, where Imam Belal Alzhuhairi endorsed Trump, describing him as the “peace candidate” and praising his pledge to end “endless wars.” Trump also criticised Liz Cheney, calling her a ‘Muslim-hating warmonger who wants to invade every Muslim country’ and accusing her father, Dick Cheney, of “killing millions of Arabs.” Moreover, Trump’s conservative stance resonated with some Muslim voters, including Mayor Amer Ghalib of Hamtramck, who opposed the Democrats’ progressive social policies, such as the inclusion of LGBTQ content in school curriculums.
While liberals scoffed at the idea, given that Biden—who is to the right of George Bush on Israel—might not end the war, Trump surprised them. Just days before his second term was set to begin, Trump declared the ceasefire an “epic” victory for peace, claiming it could only have been achieved because of his “historic” election win.
While the universe’s decipherer concluded that God doesn’t play dice, seeing the way the winds are blowing, one is almost tempted to believe that the big guy is rolling the dice for the orange man.